If you're in a relationship where there has been cheating, you'll be agonising over "how can I save our relationship?" Relationships like these can be saved, no question, but it takes time, maturity, patience and honesty.
But you'll also have to realise that some cannot be saved, and you're best to move on.
Aside from the hurt, it comes down to trust in the end.
When trust is lost it can be very hard on the other party to even consider trusting their partner again.
Some people can get over that eventually, but others are so affected by the loss of trust that they can never forgive.
If you want to save your relationship you need to talk things through with your partner.
Both of you have to be completely open and honest about where you think things went wrong, not just the affair, but what was going on before that.
There will be a measure of blame on each side that needs to be discussed and accepted.
The injured party will always want to know why the other cheated.
The cheater has to be honest in this respect.
They have to analyze their motives and share those with their partner.
Oftentimes there have been underlying issues within the relationship that, whilst not an excuse as such, can lead to a 'moment of weakness.
' Many folks 'fall into' affairs without actively seeking them; a moment of weakness made easier by the underlying problems in the relationship.
But others just have no respect for their partner and actively seek satisfaction elsewhere.
If the latter is the case, then it's best just to move on with your life, because they can never be fully trusted again.
In trying to save your relationship, you and your partner must communicate effectively.
In order to do this you both need to try to take your emotions out of the equation.
You must not accuse, blame, threaten, or act aggressively.
Be mature and come at things from the standpoint of wanting to save the relationship.
Both honestly admit your failings and weaknesses, then try to figure out how to put things right.
In answer to the "cheating - how can I save our relationship?" question, well there isn't a quick fix here.
Trust has to regained.
But you can succeed...
However, because there is so much loss of trust, a sense of betrayal, guilty feelings, etc.
, the way you communicate, the words you use, the things you do and your behaviour are extremely important.
Saying and doing the wrong things at the wrong time can effectively end all hope of a reconciliation.
So you need to know what to say, how to say it and when.
You need to know how to respond in any given situation.
And you need an action plan...