Depending on who you ask, there are anywhere from four to eight separate stages of emotions that one goes through after experiencing a relationship break up, although some of them are interchangeable and tend to occur at the same time.
For this reason, we will explore the four basic stages of breaking up and how they may have an effect on us long after the relationship is over.
When a relationship goes down hill, one of the stages or signs that's usually noticed first is a lack of communication.
If your significant other never seemed to have trouble expressing themselves to you before but now either never seem to have anything to say, or when they do say something, it's always negative, there's a good chance they're seriously contemplating ending the relationship.
In some relationships and marriages, one person suggests a trial separation in order to sort through their feelings and see what happens after "taking a break" from one another.
Sometimes, this is an easy way of saying, "It's over, and don't get your hopes up about getting back together because it won't happen," and other times, it is simply what it is - two people needing to reevaluate their priorities, their behavior toward each other, and how they feel living apart.
After the break up happens, here are the four most common emotions experienced in the order they usually occur: Denial/Shock: The first and most common emotion one experiences after the end of a relationship is shock and disbelief.
How could this be happening? And, more importantly, why? During this first stage following a break up, many people are mired in denial, refusing to accept the reality of the situation, or simply unable wrap their minds around what has just happened.
Anger: How dare they treat you this way after all you've been through together? Who do they think they are anyway? If you had any sense at all you would have kicked them out before they had the chance to leave in the first place.
(Anger isn't only directed at the other person, but also towards one's self.
) Being angry is perfectly natural, even healthy, provided you don't allow it to take over your life or dictate who you are.
Be mad, feel relief at expressing that anger, then move on.
Depression: After the anger subsides, it's common for a state of depression to set in.
How quickly you move through this stage is up to you, and of course, up to whether or not you have issues such as depression and anxiety to begin with.
Allow yourself to mourn the end of the relationship, but, if find that you're unable to function or do your job or act as you normally would when it comes to home and family life, it's time to speak to your doctor about counseling, medication, or both.
Acceptance/Understanding: And finally, the very last stage, acceptance and understanding.
After you've had the chance to experience a plethora of emotions, the end result is the realization that obviously, the relationship was not meant to be.
With this revelation comes a sense of peace, not necessarily the happy type of peace, but rather the kind where you are able to simply accept the situation for what it is.
For this reason, we will explore the four basic stages of breaking up and how they may have an effect on us long after the relationship is over.
When a relationship goes down hill, one of the stages or signs that's usually noticed first is a lack of communication.
If your significant other never seemed to have trouble expressing themselves to you before but now either never seem to have anything to say, or when they do say something, it's always negative, there's a good chance they're seriously contemplating ending the relationship.
In some relationships and marriages, one person suggests a trial separation in order to sort through their feelings and see what happens after "taking a break" from one another.
Sometimes, this is an easy way of saying, "It's over, and don't get your hopes up about getting back together because it won't happen," and other times, it is simply what it is - two people needing to reevaluate their priorities, their behavior toward each other, and how they feel living apart.
After the break up happens, here are the four most common emotions experienced in the order they usually occur: Denial/Shock: The first and most common emotion one experiences after the end of a relationship is shock and disbelief.
How could this be happening? And, more importantly, why? During this first stage following a break up, many people are mired in denial, refusing to accept the reality of the situation, or simply unable wrap their minds around what has just happened.
Anger: How dare they treat you this way after all you've been through together? Who do they think they are anyway? If you had any sense at all you would have kicked them out before they had the chance to leave in the first place.
(Anger isn't only directed at the other person, but also towards one's self.
) Being angry is perfectly natural, even healthy, provided you don't allow it to take over your life or dictate who you are.
Be mad, feel relief at expressing that anger, then move on.
Depression: After the anger subsides, it's common for a state of depression to set in.
How quickly you move through this stage is up to you, and of course, up to whether or not you have issues such as depression and anxiety to begin with.
Allow yourself to mourn the end of the relationship, but, if find that you're unable to function or do your job or act as you normally would when it comes to home and family life, it's time to speak to your doctor about counseling, medication, or both.
Acceptance/Understanding: And finally, the very last stage, acceptance and understanding.
After you've had the chance to experience a plethora of emotions, the end result is the realization that obviously, the relationship was not meant to be.
With this revelation comes a sense of peace, not necessarily the happy type of peace, but rather the kind where you are able to simply accept the situation for what it is.
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