- 1). Write down the reasons you need to end the friendship. This will help you to clearly evaluate whether cutting ties is the logical choice, or if a firm and honest conversation with your friend will help to remedy your issues. Once you decide that the friendship is over, you can decide on how to contact your ex-friend with the news.
- 2). Communicate your desire to end the friendship via a face-to-face conversation, email or written letter -- whichever way you feel would be most effective. If your decision has something to do with your ex-friend's children, explain this in detail. For instance, if you feel that your former friend's children have been a bad influence on your kids' behavior, and you've expressed this to your friend without her taking it seriously, make this known. If the ending of the friendship is strictly between you and the other adult involved, make this plain as well, and express that you don't have a problem with your children interacting at school or extracurricular activities, but you'll no longer make the effort to plan social events with her.
- 3). Explain the ending of the friendship to your children in a way that is age-appropriate. For instance, a 5-year-old may understand that he can see his friend at school, but can't go over to his house anymore. A teen or preteen will likely comprehend that you and your former friend have parted ways, because you don't feel that the relationship is best for you. If your child is old enough to maintain a friendship with your former friend's children, talk to her about your feelings, but don't make your teen feel guilty about continuing a relationship if it's safe and appropriate.
- 4). Refrain from speaking negatively about your former friend in front of your children -- similar to the way you would behave if you were ending a romantic relationship where children were involved. Once you discuss your decision with your kids and answer any questions they may have accordingly, act in a way that shows that gossip and backbiting are not necessary -- especially if these are the reasons you are no longer friends with the adult you're discussing.
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