7 Ways We Bond With Our Cats
One of the most powerful bonds known is the bond between humans and their cats. In some ways, it is an ethereal relationship - cats can sense when we don't feel well; when we experience stress or unhappiness because of finances, the job, or other personal relationships. We can also intuit when our cats are not feeling up to par, because of stress, conflict with another cat, or depression over the loss of another family cat.
At these times we feel our cat's pain and are as concerned as when our children are sick or unhappy.
The bond between people and their pets is so universal that in 1997 the Purdue University School of Veterinary Medicine changed the name of its Center for Applied Ethology and Human-Animal Interaction to Center for the Human-Animal Bond.
I'm not alone in this.
My readers also consider their cats as family members:
We Care for Our Cats in Sickness and in Health
I have often half-seriously joked that it is a shame I can't deduct my cats as dependents on my tax returns. Sometimes it seems that I spend as much time, worry, and cash on their care as I did for my three human children when they were growing up. I feel fortunate that I am able to do so, even though at times I have to make personal sacrifices to make the budget ends meet.
Part of it is because I feed them the best food I can afford, I provide plenty of scratching posts and cat trees, a safe cat litter, and enough litter boxes to accommodate four cats. And of course, cat toys are a must, and mutual play with our cats helps build our bond with them.
My last three cats, who lived long lives (Arthur, passed at 18 years, Shannon at 19, And Bubba at 18), all developed serious illness in their later years, and their veterinary costs ran into the $thousands.
Today, our four cats are indoors-only unless closely supervised, and safe from FIV, FeLV, and vehicular injuries, but still prone to some of the more common serious diseases and illness.
I do all these things for my cats because I can, with pet health insurance to help defray the costs, and because our bond is so close I couldn't not do it, as long as I am financially able. However, I'm getting to the age when I may not be able to work forever, and I'll have to cut back on expenses somewhere. I could someday be in the same boat as so many other people: having to consider economic euthanasia when needed treatment costs more than we have to spend. There sometimes comes the time in every cat lover's life when the decision has to be made to let our beloved cat go in peace, rather than live in pain and suffering. Knowing when to let go is important, but can become tragic when the decision must be based on finances rather than the cat's health condition.
Our Cats Provide Us With Therapy
It has come as no secret that pets have been used as therapy animals for years in senior care centers, nursing homes, and in some cases in hospital wards. Although for years both therapy dogs, and even therapy horses have become common, in more recent years, cats have been trained as therapy animals. S.A.R.A., Service Animal Registry of America TM claims to be the oldest organization to train and certify service animals, and it has a program for cats.
One of the most poignant stories I've read was the case of Richard, an autistic child, written by his father, J. Manerling. JM, who worked in neuroscience, thought that perhaps Richard might respond to a dog, and took him to an animal shelter one day. Although Richard walked right by the dogs and puppies, when they entered the area housing cats, Richard alerted immediately at the sight of a tuxedo cat in a cage, pointed, and said "Cat!" Read more about this fascinating story in the article, Cat Therapy for Autistic Children.
Aside from "official" therapy cats, a huge number of readers responded with their own stories, after I posted a request in a User Answer on Therapy Cats. Some of the stories are so compelling that they deserve to be shared:
We Treat Our Cats With Love and Understanding
Just as with human relationships, the relationship between the human parent and the cat is founded on love and understanding. It's almost a given that our cats love us. They show their love in over a dozen different ways, which only endear them to us more.
Understanding our cats solidifies and strengthens our love for them. The 10 Ways We Love Cats, by Amy Shojai, CABC, former Contributing Writer on Cat Behavior, demonstrate how our love and understanding are intermingled.
For example, since we understand that cats feel stress the same ways we do, we can show our love and help our cats at the same time by providing them outlets for their stress, such as scratching posts, playing with them, and loving brushing and combing.
We Never Give Up on Our Cats
To those of us whose bond to our cats is sacred, we do not give up when their behavior is not all we would expect it to be
Â
Â
If everything has been calm on the home front, take a look outside. A strange cat within view from a window, or marking the front door with urine, is a challenge to the cats inside. They may very well want to cause serious damage to the outsider, but since he is not available, a cat will savagely turn on the cat who used to be his buddy. It's called redirected aggression, and once you've seen its results, you'll be on the lookout for strays in your yard from that day forward.
Â
It's almost impossible to love your own cats without wanting to help other cats. It's just in our nature. It doesn't take away anything from our own cats, and makes us grateful to have them.
Â
We choose our human friends because they are of the same mind as we are about cats, especially when a well-loved cat dies. They will never say, "Get over it. It was just a cat." There is no such thing as "just a cat." My friends and I know that, and when one of our cats dies, we console each other the same way as if a human relative or loved one had passed on. At the same time, most of us believe that at some time in the future, we will meet out cats "on the other side," whether it be at the Rainbow Bridge, somewhere among the stars and planets of the universe, or perhaps, reincarnated in another life.
Coping with the loss of a cat is never easy. START HERE
Some of us have had dreams of our cats after their passing, or fleeting glimpses of them out of the corner of an eye. We interpret these occasions as the cat's visit to us to let us know that he or she is all right.
One of the ways we keep our memories alive while coping with the loss is to create a memorial to the cat we've lost. Doing so helps us forget the immediate pain of the loss and remember the happier times.
Death is an inevitable part of life for all of us, humans and animals.
While it is painful to contemplate losing a cat, we know that it is the eventual price we have to pay for their loving companionship. The bond remains, and, if we're fortunate, eventually we'll find the same kind of bond again with another cat.
One of the most powerful bonds known is the bond between humans and their cats. In some ways, it is an ethereal relationship - cats can sense when we don't feel well; when we experience stress or unhappiness because of finances, the job, or other personal relationships. We can also intuit when our cats are not feeling up to par, because of stress, conflict with another cat, or depression over the loss of another family cat.
At these times we feel our cat's pain and are as concerned as when our children are sick or unhappy.
The bond between people and their pets is so universal that in 1997 the Purdue University School of Veterinary Medicine changed the name of its Center for Applied Ethology and Human-Animal Interaction to Center for the Human-Animal Bond.
We Consider Our Cats Family Members
It has become so routine as to be common to see someone refer to her cat as "my baby girl," "my boy," or "my furkid." The age of the cat really doesn't matter. We can be as maternal (or paternal) toward a cat of 17 as one of two or three. In fact, in my day-to-day contact with readers, it has become fairly rare to see anyone refer to his or her cat as "my pet." To me, "pet" has the connotation of demoting my cat to second-class citizenship; about the same as considering him my "property." Although I routinely use the generic term "pets" when referring to multiple species, e.g. "cats, dogs, birds, and exotic pets," my cats are my kids, my babies, my boys and girl.I'm not alone in this.
My readers also consider their cats as family members:
We Care for Our Cats in Sickness and in Health
I have often half-seriously joked that it is a shame I can't deduct my cats as dependents on my tax returns. Sometimes it seems that I spend as much time, worry, and cash on their care as I did for my three human children when they were growing up. I feel fortunate that I am able to do so, even though at times I have to make personal sacrifices to make the budget ends meet.
Everyday Care is a Responsibility
The cost of raising and maintaining cats has increased exponentially since I first started writing about them.Part of it is because I feed them the best food I can afford, I provide plenty of scratching posts and cat trees, a safe cat litter, and enough litter boxes to accommodate four cats. And of course, cat toys are a must, and mutual play with our cats helps build our bond with them.
Veterinary Care is High Priority
Thankfully, I now have pet health insurance for all my cats. The three boys are insured through Veterinary Pet Insurance (VPI), and Jennifur is covered by Pets Best.My last three cats, who lived long lives (Arthur, passed at 18 years, Shannon at 19, And Bubba at 18), all developed serious illness in their later years, and their veterinary costs ran into the $thousands.
Today, our four cats are indoors-only unless closely supervised, and safe from FIV, FeLV, and vehicular injuries, but still prone to some of the more common serious diseases and illness.
- Joey was diagnosed hyperthyroid, and because he developed an allergy to Tapazole, he, like Bubba before him, had radioactive iodine therapy (I131
- At his six-month followup, he was doing well. However, at that time we were keeping an eye on his Hyperthropic Cardiomyopathy (HCM), which was thought to be in the early stages, and for which there is yet no known cure. Thankfully, almost 18 months after the (I131 treatment, an ultrasound revealed no evidence of HCM, however, he does have asthma and is being treated with prednisone.
- Jaspurr, Joey's littermate, is obese, at 21 pounds. He's been eating a diet of grain-free dry food and canned food, and has lost two pounds in the past three months, but still has a way to go. At a recent veterinary visit, I asked that he be tested for diabetes mellitus, and thankfully, he is free of that, so far. However at 10, he is already showing evidence of arthritis, a painful hitchhiker to obesity.
I do all these things for my cats because I can, with pet health insurance to help defray the costs, and because our bond is so close I couldn't not do it, as long as I am financially able. However, I'm getting to the age when I may not be able to work forever, and I'll have to cut back on expenses somewhere. I could someday be in the same boat as so many other people: having to consider economic euthanasia when needed treatment costs more than we have to spend. There sometimes comes the time in every cat lover's life when the decision has to be made to let our beloved cat go in peace, rather than live in pain and suffering. Knowing when to let go is important, but can become tragic when the decision must be based on finances rather than the cat's health condition.
Our Cats Provide Us With Therapy
It has come as no secret that pets have been used as therapy animals for years in senior care centers, nursing homes, and in some cases in hospital wards. Although for years both therapy dogs, and even therapy horses have become common, in more recent years, cats have been trained as therapy animals. S.A.R.A., Service Animal Registry of America TM claims to be the oldest organization to train and certify service animals, and it has a program for cats.
One of the most poignant stories I've read was the case of Richard, an autistic child, written by his father, J. Manerling. JM, who worked in neuroscience, thought that perhaps Richard might respond to a dog, and took him to an animal shelter one day. Although Richard walked right by the dogs and puppies, when they entered the area housing cats, Richard alerted immediately at the sight of a tuxedo cat in a cage, pointed, and said "Cat!" Read more about this fascinating story in the article, Cat Therapy for Autistic Children.
Aside from "official" therapy cats, a huge number of readers responded with their own stories, after I posted a request in a User Answer on Therapy Cats. Some of the stories are so compelling that they deserve to be shared:
- Our Therapy Cat JeT
My husband literally dropped dead in front of myself and my two sons 4 years ago. We buried him the Saturday before Father's Day. A year later ON Father's Day our therapy Kitty- JeT came into our lives. JeT has helped heal the part of our hearts that were torn out that day. He treats each of us differently, he seems to know when we each need extra loving. I believe he has helped all of us even more than counseling and anti-depressants. I'm not saying to quit your meds and get a cat, but a feline companion can be a great addition for good mental health.
Guest, Marenii
- My Oliver
My 15-year-old crippled kitty is my WonderCat. He wuld not leave me alone 2 years while going thru chemotherapy &, thank goodness, he'll be there again for me when I go start the chemo again in 1 week. I also take him to the nursing home where my former mom-in-law lives. She has advanced Alzheimer's & doesn't speak any more, but she loves to cuddle with him. And he knows there's something different - he never even makes a move off her bed. The sight of a cat walking on a leash brings out the best in all the patients at the home. I'm so thankful for my furry friend, Oliver!
Member, RebeccaEvans - My Sunshine - My Ray of Light and Life
I have a 11 year old furry friend sunshine I found her 11 years ago tied to a gate in a plastic bag, she was only a few weeks old, I knew I had to give her a chance of surviving. She was so fragile; nearly departing the planet, but Sunshine and I walked and grew together through her journey of recovery. She has and does repay this time and time over as I have a life limiting illness, and she keeps me alive and nurtures me through my pain and physical/mental challenges which I am faced with. She talks and chats when I need a talk and sits with me, when I try to sleep and I experience the acute pain she sings to me with her sweet purring and I drift into a peaceful sleep, Sunshine is a true gift of life/love for me.
We Treat Our Cats With Love and Understanding
Just as with human relationships, the relationship between the human parent and the cat is founded on love and understanding. It's almost a given that our cats love us. They show their love in over a dozen different ways, which only endear them to us more.
Understanding our cats solidifies and strengthens our love for them. The 10 Ways We Love Cats, by Amy Shojai, CABC, former Contributing Writer on Cat Behavior, demonstrate how our love and understanding are intermingled.
For example, since we understand that cats feel stress the same ways we do, we can show our love and help our cats at the same time by providing them outlets for their stress, such as scratching posts, playing with them, and loving brushing and combing.
We Never Give Up on Our Cats
To those of us whose bond to our cats is sacred, we do not give up when their behavior is not all we would expect it to be
When a Cat Pees Out of the Box
We do not "rub his nose in it," yell at him, or punish him in other ways. We know that cats are naturally clean by nature, and if all is well, they will use the litter boxes provided for their waste.- Vet Visit First Priority
We first take the cat to our veterinary clinic for a thorough examination, including a urinalysis and other tests, to determine if an FLUTD (Feline Urinary Tract Disorder) caused by Cystitis or a UTI could be the cause. We know that pain during urination can cause cats to avoid the litter box, and that if there is a blockage, it is considered a veterinary emergency.
- Next: Check Litter Box Cleanliness
We then make sure that all the litter boxes in the home are scrupulously clean. If not, we clean them, because a "kiss and a promise" simply won't work. No one wants to use a dirty toilet, and cats' sense of smell is far superior to ours. - Is Your Cat's Box Avoidance Fear-Based
If there is an hierarchy issue, another cat may be intimidating this one, making him afraid to use the box. Or, if the box is too close to a noise source (such as in a laundry room), the noise may also keep him away. Litter Box Placement is important. - Is Age a Factor?
Arthritis can make it painful for the cat to get in and out of the box. And sadly, some cats become senile to the point that they forget to use the box. My beloved kitty, Shannon, pictured here became senile in his last year of life.
Â
When Our Cats Fight
We first ask ourselves if there have been any recents disruptive changes in our lives, as cats are creatures of habit and intensely dislike change of any sort. Innocuous things to us, such as moving the furniture, or a weekend guest, can raise havoc with cats. Even worse, a new cat, a long-distance move, or a loud, ongoing home remodel, will result in uproar.Â
If everything has been calm on the home front, take a look outside. A strange cat within view from a window, or marking the front door with urine, is a challenge to the cats inside. They may very well want to cause serious damage to the outsider, but since he is not available, a cat will savagely turn on the cat who used to be his buddy. It's called redirected aggression, and once you've seen its results, you'll be on the lookout for strays in your yard from that day forward.
Â
When a Cat Scratches Furniture
First, we understand that cats need their claws, both for protection and for mobility. They scratch to help "sharpen" their claws, by removing the transparent sheath that covers each claw. We would never dream of declawing our cat because of illegal scratching. Instead, we provide him with legal scratching opportunities, such as scratching posts, cat towers, and plastic nail caps, such as Soft Claws.It's almost impossible to love your own cats without wanting to help other cats. It's just in our nature. It doesn't take away anything from our own cats, and makes us grateful to have them.
Â
Ways to Help Other Cats
- Volunteer at a Shelter
Shelters and Sanctuaries are always in need of volunteers, and the work can be rewarding, if heartbreaking at times. Volunteers may clean cages, do laundry, play with kittens, or hold, cuddle, or brush older cats. In short-staffed or busier shelters, you may even help with adoption paperwork. The biggest danger may be that you'll end up adopting another cat or more. But our bond with our cats is not threatened by caring for other cats.
- Join a Cat Rescue Group
If you have only one cat at home, you may want to try fostering another cat. A lot will depend on both you and your cat, as you don't want to threaten her security if having other cats come and go cause her stress. An alternative would be to help out at Adoption Day Events, routinely done on weekends at participating pet stores, such as PetSmart. - Join a TNR Group
Except for spay/neutering our own cats, TNR (Trap-Neuter-Return groups are the best way to help overcome the over-population problem of feral and stray cats. TNR groups feed feral colonies to help earn their trust. Cats are then trapped and taken to participating veterinarians, for spay or neuter, testing for FIV and FeLv, and given the Core Vaccines. The cat's ear is then "tipped," i.e., a small triangular piece is snipped off to let other TNR folks know that cat has already been trapped. The cats are then returned to the feral colony. Alley Cat Allies is an outstanding group with loads of educational material about TNR.
We choose our human friends because they are of the same mind as we are about cats, especially when a well-loved cat dies. They will never say, "Get over it. It was just a cat." There is no such thing as "just a cat." My friends and I know that, and when one of our cats dies, we console each other the same way as if a human relative or loved one had passed on. At the same time, most of us believe that at some time in the future, we will meet out cats "on the other side," whether it be at the Rainbow Bridge, somewhere among the stars and planets of the universe, or perhaps, reincarnated in another life.
Coping with the loss of a cat is never easy. START HERE
Some of us have had dreams of our cats after their passing, or fleeting glimpses of them out of the corner of an eye. We interpret these occasions as the cat's visit to us to let us know that he or she is all right.
One of the ways we keep our memories alive while coping with the loss is to create a memorial to the cat we've lost. Doing so helps us forget the immediate pain of the loss and remember the happier times.
Cats Mourn Loss Too
While there may be no scientific proof, it is painfully evident that cats can mourn the death of a companion cat or human caregiver. Perhaps it is a feeling of loss, since the other cat or person may suddenly disappear and never return. It's particularly clear when a cat is rushed away to the veterinarian in a cage and never returns. Sometimes it helps to give the cat left behind an article of clothing of his human, or a blanket or toy with the other cat's scent.Death is an inevitable part of life for all of us, humans and animals.
While it is painful to contemplate losing a cat, we know that it is the eventual price we have to pay for their loving companionship. The bond remains, and, if we're fortunate, eventually we'll find the same kind of bond again with another cat.
SHARE
