Appropriate Funeral Gifts

Flowers are a common memorial gift in the United States.thai funeral image by Adrian Hillman from Fotolia.com

When someone we care for loses a loved one, it can be difficult to express our condolences in a way that is meaningful. Memorial gifts are a quiet way to offer your support to a grieving friend and provide a remembrance of the one who has passed on. When choosing a gift, it is important to consider the recipient as well as the deceased. Your relationship to both parties, as well as their relationship with each other, can be an important factor in determining how to demonstrate your sympathy.

Simple and Welcome Touches

Often, the most precious gift you can give a grieving person is your presence. Attending the wake, funeral or memorial service and offering a kind word is a considerate and time-honored tradition. A card or note offering your sympathy and a memory of the deceased is always appropriate.

Flowers, too, offer a simple and beautiful way to let the bereaved know you are thinking of them. A florist can select a lovely arrangement to be sent to the funeral home or the family. In some cases it may also be appropriate to send flowers to the church where services will be held.

There are several symbols associated with memory, and gifts incorporating these symbols can draw attention to a shared belief system or a hope-filled viewpoint. Gifts of evergreen rosemary suggest a long memory and remembrance of the deceased. Illustrations or sculptures of angels serve as reminders that we are watched and cared for by those who've gone before. Poetry, words of Scripture or a memorial Mass can provide comfort and hope.

It is common for the family of a deceased person to suggest a charitable giving opportunity in lieu of flowers or other gifts. In these cases, the charity is usually related to a passion the deceased held in life. If you make a charitable donation in the name of the deceased, the organization will notify the family about the gift. This type of gift provides a way for a loved one's good deeds to live on after death.

If you are close to the family of the deceased, a gift of food, housekeeping assistance or other practical help can be extremely welcome. A death in the family is a stressful, chaotic event, and the simple pleasure of a warm meal or grocery delivery can relieve tension and ease transition.