1.
"Relax and it will happen".
Most people trying to get pregnant have probably exhaust all possible options or tried at least 10 methods.
They are in distress trying to make things work and most of them are discouraged by repeated failed attempts.
So asking someone who is already stressed to relax is probably the most illogical thing to say.
Furthermore, if relaxing will "cure infertility" then reproductive endocrinologists will probably lose their jobs 2.
"So when is your turn" These words are like a sharp knife, piercing through a wound that is already sore.
Most people try more than a year and some can be trying for 7-8 years or had miscarriages in the past.
For all you know there will be some trying to check if they miss their period every SINGLE month.
3.
"Have you tried putting your legs up..
..
" Unless you are struggling with infertility yourself or have extensive knowledge and training or research or methods that can likely work, it is not advisable to throw the methods that work for you to others and expect it to work like magic dust.
I think it is a natural tendency for anyone to offer concrete advice or "help" but perhaps offering a casserole may even be better than your seemingly useful tips.
4.
" Why not just adopt" Adoption will not help to overcome the burning desire someone has for having own children.
The paperwork involved can pile up like a mountain and there are many ethical, legal and long term issues to consider.
Do not give such advice unless you have firsthand experience or are trained to handle adoption matters 5.
"My friend had also tried for 10 years and she did IVF eventually" Stop comparing.
Period.
What works for one may not work for others.
I suggest this, Listen, ask how you can be of help or say I am sorry that it has been so difficult for you.
Sometimes it may be better not to solve the problem but rather as a friend, be there and offer help when asked.
The solution may eventually follow.
Remember, the battle is not yours to fight, you are just the cheerleader.
"Relax and it will happen".
Most people trying to get pregnant have probably exhaust all possible options or tried at least 10 methods.
They are in distress trying to make things work and most of them are discouraged by repeated failed attempts.
So asking someone who is already stressed to relax is probably the most illogical thing to say.
Furthermore, if relaxing will "cure infertility" then reproductive endocrinologists will probably lose their jobs 2.
"So when is your turn" These words are like a sharp knife, piercing through a wound that is already sore.
Most people try more than a year and some can be trying for 7-8 years or had miscarriages in the past.
For all you know there will be some trying to check if they miss their period every SINGLE month.
3.
"Have you tried putting your legs up..
..
" Unless you are struggling with infertility yourself or have extensive knowledge and training or research or methods that can likely work, it is not advisable to throw the methods that work for you to others and expect it to work like magic dust.
I think it is a natural tendency for anyone to offer concrete advice or "help" but perhaps offering a casserole may even be better than your seemingly useful tips.
4.
" Why not just adopt" Adoption will not help to overcome the burning desire someone has for having own children.
The paperwork involved can pile up like a mountain and there are many ethical, legal and long term issues to consider.
Do not give such advice unless you have firsthand experience or are trained to handle adoption matters 5.
"My friend had also tried for 10 years and she did IVF eventually" Stop comparing.
Period.
What works for one may not work for others.
I suggest this, Listen, ask how you can be of help or say I am sorry that it has been so difficult for you.
Sometimes it may be better not to solve the problem but rather as a friend, be there and offer help when asked.
The solution may eventually follow.
Remember, the battle is not yours to fight, you are just the cheerleader.
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