Is it possible that you feel anxious when you know everything is not under control? Have you ever thought things like: "what if I do that, and I can't get away?" or "what if I go there, and I feel weird, I feel those symptoms, then what?" For me personally, I needed to know the way out.
In restaurants, I would never let anyone sit in my way (when I need to get up and run, I need to be able to), in planes I never wanted to sit next to the window, with my car I would avoid Highways, or bridges or tunnels, because you can't stop on them.
But it went way further than this.
I also wanted everything to be perfect, to go exactly as planned.
When I had to go somewhere or do something, I would have been imagining every possible outcome for weeks...
and when reality was different, I felt anxious, because I couldn't control the situation.
Do you know anyone who is like this? I was anticipating everything.
If I had to go to a family party for instance, I would be imagining where the exits were, where I would sit, at what time I would leave my house, I made sure I didn't have any stressful events the days before and so on.
Funny right? And because so often you simply cannot control things, I would: - avoid them altogether - stress about them for weeks and weeks and even lose sleep over them I didn't have a great life anymore because of this and got some serious panic attacks.
But then in 2004 I found a way out.
There's a lot I did to stop them, but I want to let you in on one of my little secrets already.
In 2004 I met this actor and he had to go to the Tonight Show later that night.
His Manager asked him: "are you prepared, do you know what you will say?" And the actor said: "I'll see what I say when I say it.
" Wow.
How powerful is that attitude? So I tried it on many things.
"What if I...
well...
I'll see it when it happens, I'm not going to waste another second thinking about it or avoiding it UNTIL it actually happens".
And this did it for me.
Now it's easier said than done and I had to use other techniques as well.
But I sincerely hope you will test what I've talked about to see if it works for you! Do you have issues with being over anxious especially if you feel out of control? Do you have to have some kind of exit plan in every situation you are in? I know many people that have to know how they are able to leave anyplace in a hurry if they have to.
Living like this is very hard on the person and it can get so bad that they end up not going anywhere because of their anxiety.
I have also meet people where they felt that everything they said and did had to be perfect and that everything they had planned had to go perfectly and if it didn't they quickly became overwhelmed and their anxiety went through the roof.
They also tended to worry about things that may or may not happen and just doing this could make their anxiety skyrocket.
If this sounds like you, maybe you can do a little exercise that I told these people to try out.
Instead of letting your mind go crazy with anticipating everything, let go of it and think to yourself, "I'll see it, do it, and say it when it happens.
I am no longer going to waste my time thinking and avoiding anything until it really happens.
" You may think this is crazy, but just practice this and really do it and see what happens.
Practice it on small things and see if your anxiety levels don't go down.
Say the above statement over and over out loud and in your mind throughout the day.
Say it as often as you can until you truly start believing it and you're actually doing it.
Let go of the "what if's" and enjoy being in the moment.
If things don't go as planned, say to yourself that it's no big deal that everything is going to work out anyway and maybe even turn out better than it would have had it gone your way.
I have had many people tell me that this really works and they are so glad that I made them try it.
They use it daily and their anxiety is nowhere near the levels it used to be before they started using this method.
You have nothing to lose except your anxiety, so I say go for it.
Force yourself through this exercise and you will see that each time you do it, it will become easier and easier until you are doing it all the time without even thinking about it.
In restaurants, I would never let anyone sit in my way (when I need to get up and run, I need to be able to), in planes I never wanted to sit next to the window, with my car I would avoid Highways, or bridges or tunnels, because you can't stop on them.
But it went way further than this.
I also wanted everything to be perfect, to go exactly as planned.
When I had to go somewhere or do something, I would have been imagining every possible outcome for weeks...
and when reality was different, I felt anxious, because I couldn't control the situation.
Do you know anyone who is like this? I was anticipating everything.
If I had to go to a family party for instance, I would be imagining where the exits were, where I would sit, at what time I would leave my house, I made sure I didn't have any stressful events the days before and so on.
Funny right? And because so often you simply cannot control things, I would: - avoid them altogether - stress about them for weeks and weeks and even lose sleep over them I didn't have a great life anymore because of this and got some serious panic attacks.
But then in 2004 I found a way out.
There's a lot I did to stop them, but I want to let you in on one of my little secrets already.
In 2004 I met this actor and he had to go to the Tonight Show later that night.
His Manager asked him: "are you prepared, do you know what you will say?" And the actor said: "I'll see what I say when I say it.
" Wow.
How powerful is that attitude? So I tried it on many things.
"What if I...
well...
I'll see it when it happens, I'm not going to waste another second thinking about it or avoiding it UNTIL it actually happens".
And this did it for me.
Now it's easier said than done and I had to use other techniques as well.
But I sincerely hope you will test what I've talked about to see if it works for you! Do you have issues with being over anxious especially if you feel out of control? Do you have to have some kind of exit plan in every situation you are in? I know many people that have to know how they are able to leave anyplace in a hurry if they have to.
Living like this is very hard on the person and it can get so bad that they end up not going anywhere because of their anxiety.
I have also meet people where they felt that everything they said and did had to be perfect and that everything they had planned had to go perfectly and if it didn't they quickly became overwhelmed and their anxiety went through the roof.
They also tended to worry about things that may or may not happen and just doing this could make their anxiety skyrocket.
If this sounds like you, maybe you can do a little exercise that I told these people to try out.
Instead of letting your mind go crazy with anticipating everything, let go of it and think to yourself, "I'll see it, do it, and say it when it happens.
I am no longer going to waste my time thinking and avoiding anything until it really happens.
" You may think this is crazy, but just practice this and really do it and see what happens.
Practice it on small things and see if your anxiety levels don't go down.
Say the above statement over and over out loud and in your mind throughout the day.
Say it as often as you can until you truly start believing it and you're actually doing it.
Let go of the "what if's" and enjoy being in the moment.
If things don't go as planned, say to yourself that it's no big deal that everything is going to work out anyway and maybe even turn out better than it would have had it gone your way.
I have had many people tell me that this really works and they are so glad that I made them try it.
They use it daily and their anxiety is nowhere near the levels it used to be before they started using this method.
You have nothing to lose except your anxiety, so I say go for it.
Force yourself through this exercise and you will see that each time you do it, it will become easier and easier until you are doing it all the time without even thinking about it.
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