The cool autumn afternoon carried a breeze that chilled the skin as I strolled up to the neighborhood deli to buy my kids their favorite sandwiches.
Outside the deli stood a young stout male, approximately in his late teens early 20s, staring aimlessly into parking lot until I came along and temporarily awakened him from his mental slumber.
"Hey brother, how are ya doing?" he said in a sedated tone.
"I'm good, how are you?" I replied.
"Just trying figure out this thing called life before its too late" he answered.
I hesitated while I sized him up visually and then said "You're not a baby anymore.
You are in the prime of your life and should already have a plan.
The clock is definitely ticking, loudly!" He let out a hardy laugh and proceeded to walk down the street.
The scary thing about this conversation was that I was far from making a joke.
Disappointed, I opened the deli door and was immediately comforted by the prettiest smile I had seen in some time.
A young lady behind the counter greeted me as I came in.
As she made my order, she struck up an engaging conversation.
She was 21 years old.
She was working there to help put her through college and eventually through a local university.
Her major is medicine and she eventually wants to become a family doctor.
She overwhelmed me with her ambition, intellect and charisma.
After the encounter with the gentlemen outside the deli, I truly felt as if I was playing for the wrong team.
Sadly, this is not a unique occurrence in today's society but an alarming trend.
Educated males and concerned, active fathers are dying off in today's societal landscape.
The U.
S.
Census Bureau reports that since 1991, the proportion of young women enrolled in college has exceeded the enrollment rate of young men, and the gap has widened over time.
By 2005 women made up the majority-54 percent- of the 10.
8 million young adults enrolled in college.
Young men from minority and lower income groups are especially vulnerable to this downward academic trend.
High school attendance and achievement continues to be low among Hispanic and African American males, which is why some colleges are now actively recruiting male students in order to bring men's enrollment rates in line with those of women.
The fading of man is not only relegated to intellectual stages.
What is even more frightening is the continual decline of the male role in the household as well as the raising of our youth.
The U.
S.
Census Bureau also reports that approximately 84% of custodial parents are mothers with the father no where to be seen.
Only 16% of custodial parents are fathers.
Births to unmarried women constituted 36 percent of all births in 2004, reaching a record high of nearly 1.
5 million births.
These are not immaculate conceptions.
There are 1.
5 million men missing from the picture.
Society pays a stiff price for these absentee fathers.
75% of children/adolescents in chemical dependency hospitals are from single-parent families.
More than one half of all youths incarcerated for criminal acts lived in one-parent families.
FBI records show 63% of suicides is individuals from single parent homes.
Finally, 75% of teenage pregnancies are adolescents from single parent homes.
Make no mistake.
Moms around the globe have successfully raised pillars of our community.
Single parent mothers have raised children that have gone on to do extraordinary things.
See Barack Obama.
I am merely asking us men to step up and do our part.
I am sure Mom wouldn't mind a little breather now and then.
I was one of the few that were blessed with both a priceless mother and an irreplaceable father.
I simply would not have survived if I did not have BOTH of them in my life.
One never higher than the other, they have been equal partners in life.
Sharing the pleasures and pains of raising 9 children, they bare the equal load of love and happiness and sorrow.
While my mother has been my back bone and my rock, I would like to send a special shout out to my father for staying with my mom and helping her through all these years.
But most importantly, I would like to thank him for showing me what it means to be a real man and a loving father.
Here is to you Dad.
You are a dying breed.
Outside the deli stood a young stout male, approximately in his late teens early 20s, staring aimlessly into parking lot until I came along and temporarily awakened him from his mental slumber.
"Hey brother, how are ya doing?" he said in a sedated tone.
"I'm good, how are you?" I replied.
"Just trying figure out this thing called life before its too late" he answered.
I hesitated while I sized him up visually and then said "You're not a baby anymore.
You are in the prime of your life and should already have a plan.
The clock is definitely ticking, loudly!" He let out a hardy laugh and proceeded to walk down the street.
The scary thing about this conversation was that I was far from making a joke.
Disappointed, I opened the deli door and was immediately comforted by the prettiest smile I had seen in some time.
A young lady behind the counter greeted me as I came in.
As she made my order, she struck up an engaging conversation.
She was 21 years old.
She was working there to help put her through college and eventually through a local university.
Her major is medicine and she eventually wants to become a family doctor.
She overwhelmed me with her ambition, intellect and charisma.
After the encounter with the gentlemen outside the deli, I truly felt as if I was playing for the wrong team.
Sadly, this is not a unique occurrence in today's society but an alarming trend.
Educated males and concerned, active fathers are dying off in today's societal landscape.
The U.
S.
Census Bureau reports that since 1991, the proportion of young women enrolled in college has exceeded the enrollment rate of young men, and the gap has widened over time.
By 2005 women made up the majority-54 percent- of the 10.
8 million young adults enrolled in college.
Young men from minority and lower income groups are especially vulnerable to this downward academic trend.
High school attendance and achievement continues to be low among Hispanic and African American males, which is why some colleges are now actively recruiting male students in order to bring men's enrollment rates in line with those of women.
The fading of man is not only relegated to intellectual stages.
What is even more frightening is the continual decline of the male role in the household as well as the raising of our youth.
The U.
S.
Census Bureau also reports that approximately 84% of custodial parents are mothers with the father no where to be seen.
Only 16% of custodial parents are fathers.
Births to unmarried women constituted 36 percent of all births in 2004, reaching a record high of nearly 1.
5 million births.
These are not immaculate conceptions.
There are 1.
5 million men missing from the picture.
Society pays a stiff price for these absentee fathers.
75% of children/adolescents in chemical dependency hospitals are from single-parent families.
More than one half of all youths incarcerated for criminal acts lived in one-parent families.
FBI records show 63% of suicides is individuals from single parent homes.
Finally, 75% of teenage pregnancies are adolescents from single parent homes.
Make no mistake.
Moms around the globe have successfully raised pillars of our community.
Single parent mothers have raised children that have gone on to do extraordinary things.
See Barack Obama.
I am merely asking us men to step up and do our part.
I am sure Mom wouldn't mind a little breather now and then.
I was one of the few that were blessed with both a priceless mother and an irreplaceable father.
I simply would not have survived if I did not have BOTH of them in my life.
One never higher than the other, they have been equal partners in life.
Sharing the pleasures and pains of raising 9 children, they bare the equal load of love and happiness and sorrow.
While my mother has been my back bone and my rock, I would like to send a special shout out to my father for staying with my mom and helping her through all these years.
But most importantly, I would like to thank him for showing me what it means to be a real man and a loving father.
Here is to you Dad.
You are a dying breed.
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