When doing a liver cleanse, you begin by flushing all the digested food out of your intestines.
Why - so when the toxins come out of your liver they will have a good clean path for getting out of you.
One of the common potions we use for flushing our intestines is magnesium.
If you drink three glasses of water with a heaping teaspoon of magnesium powder in each one, it's usually enough to give you at least six really good trips to the bathroom.
By then you're DEFINITELY gonna be emptied out.
In 2005 - I was doing my annual liver cleanse.
I just began the "intestinal flushing phase", and even though I had drunk all three glasses of magnesium solution, nothing was coming out my tail end yet.
When I looked at my watch I got a little concerned - I had an energy healing class I was scheduled to teach at 7PM, and it was already almost 5:30.
I wanted to get my intestines flushed out before class so it wouldn't interfere with the teaching.
There's an old trick I learned - if you really need to poop, and NOTHING else is working, here's what to do: you take two giant sized Asian pears and a teaspoon of sea salt - add two cups of warm water, blend them thoroughly, and drink.
This all but guarantees one of the biggest bowel empty-outs you've ever had.
So that's what I did.
It was 5:45 now, and only a fifteen minute drive to my office, so I calculated that if I drank the salt and pear mixture now, it would give me plenty enough time to get to the office - go down to the bathroom and do my business - then be ready in time to teach class.
But that's not exactly how the whole thing went down.
When I got to within a mile of my office exit, all the freeway traffic came to a dead stop.
Evidently there was an accident up ahead - and we couldn't drive either forward or back.
As I sat stuck...
my intestines slowly started percolating.
It seemed like something I could handle though...
In fact, I KNEW I could...
if only the traffic would get moving again.
BUT - the traffic just sat there in one place.
Five minutes, ten, fifteen...
By now the percolating was starting to become more like a heaving, and I found myself trying to tighten my stomach - clench my fists - tighten my butt hole - whatever I had to do to keep the poop up inside of me...
instead of in my pants.
My eyes started bugging out.
By now I was clenching my jaws and teeth, and tightening my body from head to toe...
...
and then finally...
the traffic started moving again - very slowly at first - but at least moving.
Phew! I was freaking out - worrying that I wouldn't make it.
But then, just as I got to my exit, I nosed my car up into the exit lane, and a semi-truck came to a dead stop in front of me.
By now the heaving feeling in my gut felt like a volcano that was about to erupt - and with one huge intestinal hiccup...
shit exploded out of me - the biggest, shittiest eruption in my entire life.
It exploded out of the back of my pants, and up the back of my white shirt, all the way to my shoulder blades.
It exploded up over my front waistband and sprayed all the way up to my chin.
It shot down both pant legs - and by the time it was done erupting, I had shit all over my driver's seat, my floor, the console, and all over my driver's door.
I drove to my parking space at work.
When I stepped out of my car, a steady trail of shit oozed out from behind me, and as I walked, I tracked it all the way across the parking lot.
I started up the stairs to get to my office, but within a few steps I looked up and realized that all four of the women in the class were waiting for me at the top of the stairs - waiting for me to unlock my office so they could go in.
When I got to the top stairs, all I could do was mumble a very weak "I had an accident.
I need to go clean up" - which set them off laughing hysterically and uncontrollably.
In the bathroom - I scrubbed and scrubbed on my body, my shirt, my underwear, and my pants.
I scrubbed for close to a half hour, but it was pretty much a wasted effort.
There wasn't enough soap in the world to get all that stink and stain off of my clothes and me.
With no other clothes to put on, I had to put the same shit-infested clothes back on and do the best I could.
When I finally got back to my office, the women did their best to not laugh at me.
At the same time though - how do you NOT laugh when someone has done something as bizarre as I did? The question was - do I stay or do I go? To this day I don't know why I didn't just bolt out of there - but in the end, we just opened ALL of the doors and windows to the office - and for the next two hours we engaged in one of the most outrageously cool energy classes I've ever taught - even though we felt like we were trapped in a port-a-john that had been used for a month.
I tell you this story for a good reason.
Once upon a time I used to worry about getting embarrassed.
I use to fret about little things - like having bad breath, or forgetting to zip my fly, or what if I got busted blowing a really nasty fart in public, or what if, what if, what if...
? And I never realized how much paralysis all of that "being afraid...
" was causing me.
"The fear of getting embarrassed for the things we do" - that's gotta be one of the biggest strait jackets we can get ourselves locked up in.
I know it was a monstrous one for me.
And so, as said, I tell you this story - because for me, the amount of liberation I got on THAT day - even though it WAS the single most embarrassing thing I ever went through in my life, it turned out to be one of the most liberating experiences I've ever had.
After shitting my pants and standing in front of that group of women - after teaching for two hours in those same disgusting clothes - I can't think of ANYTHING that could ever embarrass me again.
Singing out of key? No biggie.
Giving a lousy speech? No problemo.
Or even having my pants fall down on stage? Again - who cares? It sure ain't me! So if you have a fear of getting embarrassed - and it's got YOU paralyzed - and making you afraid to get out of your comfort zone to try something new - then try this - do something as outrageous as you can possibly imagine - and if you really want to go for it, do like I did - go shit your pants - a really disgusting shit - then go hang out in public for a couple hours - in a place where everyone knows you.
I'm pretty sure, if that doesn't cure you - nothing will.
Why - so when the toxins come out of your liver they will have a good clean path for getting out of you.
One of the common potions we use for flushing our intestines is magnesium.
If you drink three glasses of water with a heaping teaspoon of magnesium powder in each one, it's usually enough to give you at least six really good trips to the bathroom.
By then you're DEFINITELY gonna be emptied out.
In 2005 - I was doing my annual liver cleanse.
I just began the "intestinal flushing phase", and even though I had drunk all three glasses of magnesium solution, nothing was coming out my tail end yet.
When I looked at my watch I got a little concerned - I had an energy healing class I was scheduled to teach at 7PM, and it was already almost 5:30.
I wanted to get my intestines flushed out before class so it wouldn't interfere with the teaching.
There's an old trick I learned - if you really need to poop, and NOTHING else is working, here's what to do: you take two giant sized Asian pears and a teaspoon of sea salt - add two cups of warm water, blend them thoroughly, and drink.
This all but guarantees one of the biggest bowel empty-outs you've ever had.
So that's what I did.
It was 5:45 now, and only a fifteen minute drive to my office, so I calculated that if I drank the salt and pear mixture now, it would give me plenty enough time to get to the office - go down to the bathroom and do my business - then be ready in time to teach class.
But that's not exactly how the whole thing went down.
When I got to within a mile of my office exit, all the freeway traffic came to a dead stop.
Evidently there was an accident up ahead - and we couldn't drive either forward or back.
As I sat stuck...
my intestines slowly started percolating.
It seemed like something I could handle though...
In fact, I KNEW I could...
if only the traffic would get moving again.
BUT - the traffic just sat there in one place.
Five minutes, ten, fifteen...
By now the percolating was starting to become more like a heaving, and I found myself trying to tighten my stomach - clench my fists - tighten my butt hole - whatever I had to do to keep the poop up inside of me...
instead of in my pants.
My eyes started bugging out.
By now I was clenching my jaws and teeth, and tightening my body from head to toe...
...
and then finally...
the traffic started moving again - very slowly at first - but at least moving.
Phew! I was freaking out - worrying that I wouldn't make it.
But then, just as I got to my exit, I nosed my car up into the exit lane, and a semi-truck came to a dead stop in front of me.
By now the heaving feeling in my gut felt like a volcano that was about to erupt - and with one huge intestinal hiccup...
shit exploded out of me - the biggest, shittiest eruption in my entire life.
It exploded out of the back of my pants, and up the back of my white shirt, all the way to my shoulder blades.
It exploded up over my front waistband and sprayed all the way up to my chin.
It shot down both pant legs - and by the time it was done erupting, I had shit all over my driver's seat, my floor, the console, and all over my driver's door.
I drove to my parking space at work.
When I stepped out of my car, a steady trail of shit oozed out from behind me, and as I walked, I tracked it all the way across the parking lot.
I started up the stairs to get to my office, but within a few steps I looked up and realized that all four of the women in the class were waiting for me at the top of the stairs - waiting for me to unlock my office so they could go in.
When I got to the top stairs, all I could do was mumble a very weak "I had an accident.
I need to go clean up" - which set them off laughing hysterically and uncontrollably.
In the bathroom - I scrubbed and scrubbed on my body, my shirt, my underwear, and my pants.
I scrubbed for close to a half hour, but it was pretty much a wasted effort.
There wasn't enough soap in the world to get all that stink and stain off of my clothes and me.
With no other clothes to put on, I had to put the same shit-infested clothes back on and do the best I could.
When I finally got back to my office, the women did their best to not laugh at me.
At the same time though - how do you NOT laugh when someone has done something as bizarre as I did? The question was - do I stay or do I go? To this day I don't know why I didn't just bolt out of there - but in the end, we just opened ALL of the doors and windows to the office - and for the next two hours we engaged in one of the most outrageously cool energy classes I've ever taught - even though we felt like we were trapped in a port-a-john that had been used for a month.
I tell you this story for a good reason.
Once upon a time I used to worry about getting embarrassed.
I use to fret about little things - like having bad breath, or forgetting to zip my fly, or what if I got busted blowing a really nasty fart in public, or what if, what if, what if...
? And I never realized how much paralysis all of that "being afraid...
" was causing me.
"The fear of getting embarrassed for the things we do" - that's gotta be one of the biggest strait jackets we can get ourselves locked up in.
I know it was a monstrous one for me.
And so, as said, I tell you this story - because for me, the amount of liberation I got on THAT day - even though it WAS the single most embarrassing thing I ever went through in my life, it turned out to be one of the most liberating experiences I've ever had.
After shitting my pants and standing in front of that group of women - after teaching for two hours in those same disgusting clothes - I can't think of ANYTHING that could ever embarrass me again.
Singing out of key? No biggie.
Giving a lousy speech? No problemo.
Or even having my pants fall down on stage? Again - who cares? It sure ain't me! So if you have a fear of getting embarrassed - and it's got YOU paralyzed - and making you afraid to get out of your comfort zone to try something new - then try this - do something as outrageous as you can possibly imagine - and if you really want to go for it, do like I did - go shit your pants - a really disgusting shit - then go hang out in public for a couple hours - in a place where everyone knows you.
I'm pretty sure, if that doesn't cure you - nothing will.
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