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G.I. Joe Retaliation could be the poster child for the campaign against 3D conversions. It's literally painful to watch in that format, and my eyes often couldn't focus or keep up with the action due to the conversion to 3D. The edges seemed jiggly, if that makes any sense, and anyone who pays extra to see this G.I. Joe sequel this way is not only throwing away their money but also likely to emerge with a headache.

What makes the whole thing doubly painful is the fact Paramount Pictures actually delayed the film's release in order to put it out in theaters in 3D. Talk about your bad decisions...

Paramount's first G.I. Joe movie was basically a train wreck. Unfortunately, lessons were not learned and the sequel is not much better than its predecessor. Sure, there's a ton of action - most of it of the over-the-top variety. And yes, there are studly men (Dwayne Johnson, DJ Cotrona, Channing Tatum, Ray Stevenson, ) and a couple of lovely ladies (Adrianne Palicki, Elodie Yung) who appear to handle themselves well in the action scenes. But any time the action stops and dialogue is needed to move the movie forward, G.I. Joe Retaliation scrapes the bottom of the barrel and comes up with tired action movie cliches.

Plus, this time around we have the incorporation of X-Men and mutants in the plot which makes zero sense.

I'm not even going to try and explain the plot because it's not worth the effort, and I'm sure any attempt to do so would only serve to bring back my 3D headache.

Are audiences really this gullible that they'll pay for product that doesn't even seem to be trying to tell a coherent story? Granted, it's a big-budget blow 'em up action movie in which the story is secondary. But here the story isn't even second-fiddle to the action - it's completely pushed aside in order to cram in more weapons, more destruction, and more fight scenes. And while there are a few action sequences that grab your attention (the ninjas swinging off the side of cliffs is pretty impressive), for the most part this is more of the same-old-same-old.

To put it bluntly: move along, there's nothing to see here.

Grade: D

G.I. Joe Retaliation was directed by Jon M Chu and is rated PG-13 for intense sequences of combat violence and martial arts action throughout, and for brief sensuality and language.

Theatrical Release: March 29, 2013