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The Ever-Present Folks on the Pulpit

With even men of the cloth downing the chalice and tying nuptial knots of holy matrimony with twilight girls in picture- perfect weddings, liturgical matters have become juicy epicenters if whimsical controversy.
Far from the contentious debate of celibacy, there is these holier-than-thou folks who obscure others in the service of the Most High.
While we know that every Christian worth their salt feels good when they offer their selfless service their Creator, what is to be said of sanctimonious folks who bestride all the church proceedings like a colossus? Such worshippers will volunteer to shepherd the rest during the intercessory before praying for the person reading the announcements that they readily represent at the slightest hint that they might be absent.
When it is time for praise and worship the guy will be seen pouring tears while holding two microphones yelling into each, in turns.
When praising is over, it is time for offerings and the same fellow volunteers a throaty prayer, outruns the rest in taking the kiondo and takes it round from person to person.
As if not noticing his selfish monotony, the undiscerning brother-in-Christ will propose that his favorite hymn be sung and still offers to lead it despite his obvious lack of talent in music.
The preacher has gone to evangelize in another church and the person feels that God must have surely planned that he must deliver an impromptu sermon.
He prays for himself and starts jumping on the pulpit, from verse to verse, testament to testament! See? The guy has fellowshipped alone, served in all capacities and taken all the heavenly blessings at the expense of others!
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